Now Showing: An Unhinged Mind

Remembering mania

Photo by Jeremy Yap on Unsplash

“The Senator,” spelled out in giant illuminated golden letters, floated above the red and white marquee. In thick black letters it read, Now Showing: An Unhinged Mind. “Ohhhh, a psychological thriller,” I said to myself as I headed into the Baltimore City theatre which had been standing since 1939. I smiled when the teenage boy working the window asked if I was meeting anyone.

Damn, can’t a bitch take herself out? I thought.

“Just me,” I said.

As soon as he handed me my ticket, he quickly exited the back door of the box office and met me at the concession stand counter.

“What would you like?” he asked. I couldn’t stifle my giggle.

“A Jack of all trades. No, a Kevin, a Kevin of all trades.” I caught a glimpse of his name tag and wanted to be respectful.

“You have noooooooo idea,” he said in teenage theatrics.

I ordered a popcorn too big for one person, Bunch a Crunch, and a Ginger Ale because my stomach was slightly upset and Black people swear Ginger Ale can heal anything. I made my way towards the theatre. When Kevin was the one to rip my ticket in two, I quickly realized Kevin was not being dramatic, they were working his ass.

“Thanks Kevin…you know… for like… everything,” I said, holding the Ginger Ale up like I was making a toast.

“Theatre four.” he said with a nod and a smile.

I giggled the entire way down the hallway, the walls plastered with coming-soon posters. “I Want it That Way,” the undisputed classic from the greatest boyband of all time, played low over the speakers like background music. When I entered the theatre I quickly took a seat in the vintage red velvet chairs, a quick reminder that being there was all about nostalgia and experience, not about comfort.

I haven’t seen a psychological thriller in a while…What was the last psychological thriller I saw?

My thoughts are quickly interrupted because, in walks Kevin. He’s there to turn off the lights and start the movie.

“Kevin! Quit playin! Ain’t no way! They payin’ you overtime? Is there a union?” Besides me and Kevin of all Trades, the theatre is empty. Kevin breaks, he knows this is ridiculous and funny, ridiculously funny, and he belly laughs.

“You’re funny as hell," he says between scream laughs.”

“You're busy as hell.” Laughter bounces off the walls, echoing around us in the empty theatre. We are both in hysterics.

“Let me quit messing with you, " I say, wiping tears. “Go on ahead and do what you’re supposed to do, because I just know they got something else for you to do after this.”

Kevin hits a button and the giant, mustard colored curtain hiding the screen, splits at the center and slowly drags itself to either side.

The lights dim.

The theatre goes black.

The movie starts.

FLASH

“That’s because you’re a white apologist and an oppositional conversationalist!” Our protagonist screams at what appears to be her partner.” He has just brought her steamed vegetables, and asks if she wants a hug. She may hate him, but he knows she still needs to eat. Scowling, she refuses the hug. He turns and walks away without a word. The opening scene is intense.

Okay wait, so they are living a part, he’s taking care of the kids in a house 3 doors down and is also trying to take care of her? Girl you better take them damn vegetables. Why can we see his face but not hers?

A flash, and we are in another scene. She’s sweating, her t-shirt soaked through. Our protagonist remains faceless as she hides behind her bedroom door. On the other side, a child demands her attention.

“Mom…… Mommy…..Momma…..Mom” The little girl says as she knocks on the bedroom door. Our protagonist does not answer. Today, she needs quiet, just as much as she needs oxygen. But the knocking doesn’t stop.

Maybe if she doesn’t respond, the child will go away. She clearly needs a break.

Our protagonist swings the door open and at the top of her lungs, screams at the child.

“I’M NOT JUST A MOM, I”M A PERSON TOO! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

She pushes the little girl out of the door frame and slams the door. I’m judging her, I judge her hard.

I hate her.

FLASH

Candles surround her, The Dollar Store kind that usually have saints and white Jesus on the front, and long skinny ones balanced in Five Below candle stick holders. The glow washes over where her face should be. There are black and white photos spread out in front of her. She whispers to her ancestors.

Asé.

FLASH

It’s her and her partner again. He’s dressed in a neon vest. A tiny whistle dangles from his neck. His right hand grips a mini stop sign. His expression, bewildered. She’s disheveled, screaming at him, pointing her finger accusingly. A vein in her neck looks like it may erupt. Their barking dog adds to the tension.

I’m confused. She’s mad because he volunteers to be the school crossing guard?! To help the kids and the community! That’s a good man Savannah, what the hell’s wrong with you?

FLASH

Here she is convincing people that she’s Pete Davidson’s deceased Dad.

Wait, what the fuck.

FLASH

Our faceless protagonist is walking the city streets of Baltimore in the dark. It’s the middle of the night. She’s alone. She walks and walks and walks some more. She walks through a park, fireflies flitter above the grass and the wind blows lightly through the trees. She finds a bench and sits staring out at the starry-filled sky. Eventually she falls asleep on it. She wakes up hours later.

My God, the things that could have happened to her. What is happening to her?

FLASH

She’s sitting legs crossed on the ground. Her hands, palm up, are resting on her knees. She’s meditating. Her head is tilted up towards the heavens. She whispers, “Remember me, Remember who you are.”

Remember me, remember who you are…whew, a whole ass sermon.

FLASH.

FLASH.

FLASH.

She’s standing alone in an empty room, her back facing the camera. She slowly starts to turn.

Finally! Will they show her to us already?!

Either it’s the slowest 180 degree turn ever, or I’m impatient.

Hurry up, bitch!

She’s made her way around. And I can’t breathe. Oxygen dissipates from the theatre and I grasp the arm of my seat.

I’m going to pass out, where the hell is Kevin?

She’s broken the fourth wall. She’s staring into my soul and my body is frozen.